Thursday, August 21, 2014

The Power of Tronk - Il Potere di Tronk

This Thursday started with a playful  boy jumping on my bed. Having spent last night working on two children programs until late, I wasn't enthusiastic about playing Tronk's favorite pancio puncio at 7:15 am. Pancio Puncio has been Tronk's favorite game with his father for quite a while. The game consists in pinching one's tommy while saying the words pancio puncio (the closest correspondent in English would be "belly sbelly")So I said "We'll have breakfast and then we'll go to your favorite playground in Cambridge. How about that?". Big smile on Tronk's face.

Ehem, can't move left foot. Bone sticking out in left part of foot swollen. Can't bend right knee. Eyes with that familiar feeling that I have insects crawling in the cornea. Hormones earthquake! Aha, the joy of being a woman. Doesn't matter. I must get up.

Ooops, I forgot to call my mother. Her birthday was yesterday. They don't deliver to my parents' house in the mountains. Flowers with card did not arrive. Didn't talk with my mom for a month. The last time we talked we had a fight. Hell. I decide to tell her the truth. Mom, I forgot your birthday. Surprisingly, she is not at all upset. My last letter with fond memories from the past has made her happy. She is willing to talk with me with a sweet tone. Cool. Aha, there she is, she is back to complaining about my inability to care, call her, send messages, blah, blah, blah.

You have time to go on a beach vacation and enjoy yourself but not to call your mother and we are stuck here, alone, in this cold chalet? But mom I did not go on a warm sandy beach on vacation for a month like you guys used to do. I spent a week in the cool (cold) northern coast of Maine, where there was no internet. There, you cannot get a nice tan on the beach with an aperitivo in your hand and occasionally go for a swim. The sea is too cold. People go there to camp or walk trails. Walk trails? Yes mom and, if you cannot walk, like me, there, in the national park, you just sit on a rock and look at the beautiful cloudy sky. But I saw a picture of the sea on Facebook! You were swimming. No, mom. That was a picture of a whale I took from a ship. A whale? Well, I only caught a tail and a fin in the picture but for me that was enough. I was trying not to fall on someone's vomit. Mom silent.

Ooops, paint and brushes on the floor. Mom, Tronk is about to start painting the floor. I have to go. Impossible to persuade her to go. She simply cannot leave.

Ten minutes later, Tronk screams: COLAZIONE!!  COLAZIONE, MAMMA!! COLAZIONE!! (BREAKFAST!! BREAKFAST, MOM!!  BREAKFAST!! ) Well, I guess it's lunchtime. Ok, I'll heat something. Tronk: Mamma, il cibo e' vecchio! (Mom, the food is old!)  Food all over the floor. Then down in the sink. 1 pm. I start cooking penne al salmone. Tronk comes to me every five minutes to ask my opinion on his idea of using magic tricks attached to his body as the tool of a superhero who fires web from his leg. Lunch delayed. Thirty minutes later: I am forced to spoon feed him.

Ok Tronk, I'll take you to the playground but only after buying a bra. Ma mamma, non hai bisogno di un reggiseno! Perche' non ti metti una maglietta come me o un asciugamano sulle spalle?  (But mom, you don't need a bra! Why don't you just put a shirt like me or a towel on your shoulders?) Ehem, actually, I can't. Perche' no? (Why not?) Bra shopping turns out to be expensive - why did I not go to Macy where they know what cards to use to turn any price down? - and nightmarish, with Tronk giving me the wrong advice. Ma mamma, perche' non scegli quello grande, fantasia leopardo? (But mom, why don't you choose the big one with the leopard fabric?) Ehem, no. Why not?? 

Listen, why are you destroying, once again, the nicest shirt you have by stretching it on your head? Mamma, sono un fantasma! (Mom, I am ghost!)

Here we are, the playground. Ok, go play! Ma mamma, portami dei giocattoli su questa nave. Qui non c'e' niente. (But mom, bring me some toys on this ship. There is nothing here). Come on, go play in the sand! I didn't say in the mud, in the sand.

What? Have I left the phone at home?

On the bus. Tronk about to fall on someone's lap: Sono stanco! Voglio sedermi! (I am tired! I want to sit down) An old man gives Tronk his seat, despite me insisting that a young child doesn't need to sit down, while silently thinking they should ask the mother is she needs a seat. Perche' quel bimbo mangia una cosa schifosa verde? (why that boy is eating a disgusting green thing?)

Tronk, stop tearing leaves from the yard of people's houses. Mamma, e' il veleno che voglio mettere nella mia casetta in giardino per uccidere i cattivi quando gioco con gli amici. (Mom, it's the poison I want to put in my playhouse in the yard to kill the bad people when I play with friends)

Finally home. I am about to fall apart. Tronk looks at me with an enchanted face and says: Mamma, se smettono di far nascere le donne, non ci sara' piu' vita. Le donne fanno nascere le persone! (Mom, if people stop giving birth to women, there will no longer be life. Women give life to people!)

So I guess this is the power of Tronk: he always knows what to say to make me forget a shitty day.